hating myself

I looked in the mirror just now, and I realized my face is worse than before :( I started using Clindamycin and Retin A 0.025% after my second chempeel. I used those products last year and did wonders to my skin. I was expecting the same result, but I'm disappointed right now. My face is covered with red dots from active pimples and the scar T T

Using Paul & Joe Powder Foundation sure helps with the redness, but for the big ones, it turns brown :( luckily this time I only use Retin A as spot treatment. I know that the red dots come from clogged pores so this is purging effect, but after comparing the before and after pics made me so sad and almost slam my desk. Not to mention I just found out another allergen. So sad... And today I'm going to take my passport pic. Hope to look pretty because I'll use it for the next 5 years, arghhhh.....